Why I Have Deleted The Uber App From My Phone

Uber. So helpful, cheap and accessible, right? I have used them on and off for a few years, in the UK, USA and South Africa, and they have always been relatively reliable, presuming they kind-of know the area in which they’re driving and don’t ALWAYS rely on their sat nav app to get them to the destination.

I have recently had nothing but bad experiences with them, so have decided to delete the app from my phone permanently. The main reason being that I just can’t rely on them like I used to.

In my post ‘Rain, Rain, Go Away‘ I talked about one of the reasons why I am now feeling compelled to write this post. We booked an Uber on said rainy morning to take myself and Khaya to school. We had a driver accept the journey and he was making his way to us from our local train station, where he’d just made a drop-off. About three minutes before he was due to arrive, he cancelled the journey. Luckily, I was still able to walk/swim to the school to get Khaya there on time, but it was close! I was so angry that I complained to Uber and received some standard email in response, apologising for any inconvenience, etc, etc. Reason One.

Reason Two actually happened a few months ago. I went to our local Asda to get a big shop and I ordered an Uber to come and pick me up and take me home. I had limited funds in my bank account, so was shocked when they withdrew the upper amount of the estimated travel fee at the moment I booked the ride, rather than charging me for the actual trip fee at the end. It was a busy time, apparently, and the fee would be a bit higher due to high demand. I didn’t expect it to be as high as it ended up being, though. My driver arrived and dithered about which way he was going to get me home. He turned around a couple of times and eventually took a good back route, avoiding the traffic. When I checked the fare for the trip at the end, it was £9.21. For about a mile journey! I was so disappointed… More so because I probably could have called our local cab firm and got the same journey for about half of that price (A mistake I shall never make again!).

My grandfather always says he hates Uber and would never use them as they don’t have ‘The Knowledge’ of London like real cab drivers do. But, he also doesn’t agree with the ethics. I can understand all of this, but I always used them despite their problems, as they were so reliable and easy to use.

When we were staying in Johannesburg in 2016, we used Uber a lot. It was great – Cheap, reliable and efficient. I felt bad about not using the slightly-more-expensive cab driver that we had met, who worked for a smaller company, but Uber was so much easier. That was until we had a nightmare trip to Joburg Zoo and I realised that having no mobile data or wifi was almost life-threatening (or, at least, sanity-threatening!). We (Khaya and a pregnant I) arranged to meet a new friend there, but she didn’t show up. I had limited use of my phone, so tried to look around to see if any part of the zoo had wifi (I was even ready to pay for it!) so I could call her and/or order an Uber to go home again. No wifi at the restaurant, but there were wifi points all over the zoo. We made our way to the nearest one, which was next to the statue of the late Max, a gorilla who passed away at the zoo in 2004. I managed to send some iMessages to said friend, no replies (I later found out she left her phone at home). I managed to book an Uber, but I knew that as soon as I moved away from Max and towards the exit, I’d lose signal and have to HOPE that the driver met me at the right place, without being able to check if he was even still coming! Luckily all was OK in the end, but I wonder if the same happy ending would have occured in London?? I expect the driver would have just cancelled on me, leaving me high and dry, crying on the roadside after the zoo closed. Perhaps UK Uber drivers should take some lessons from the SA ones.

Reason Three is simple – I can’t ride in an Uber with my two boys without car seats. Either I carry two car seats around with me permanently in case I need an Uber in an emergency, or I leave the kids behind.

I rarely have the need for an Uber/taxi nowadays, and it’s always a no-go with the two boys. We have amazing public transport around us and we now have use of a family car when we need it. We’re all set without you, Uber, thank you. Now go and let down all the rest of London!

And… delete.

On another note, my lovely readers, I’d love to hear about your experiences with Uber and whether you have stopped using them and, if so, what was the clincher?

NSG xxx

Cover photo credit: Austin Distel on Unsplash

Rain, rain GO AWAY!

Life, Parenting

I want to start this post by saying that I actually love rain. Rain is so important and vital to the smooth running of this planet. I remember being in Malawi during a terrible drought and, when the rain finally came, we were all so happy to see it! Even us miserable Brits.

I love rainy days indoors – Chilling on the sofa with a cuppa and an old movie, occasionally looking smugly out of the window at the poor unfortunate souls having to travel and go out in this oppressive weather. You really can’t beat that.

But yesterday, my relationship with the rain became soured. As did my relationship with Uber… which was already souring quite rapidly after a ridiculously expensive trip home from my local Asda about a month ago. Let me tell you all about it…

My eldest son started school last week. It has been a huge change for all the family, and we are really having to pull our socks up more than ever before, despite being exhausted after all the laundry, ironing, organising, planning, getting him to bed and school on time, etc. We have always been a bit relaxed about getting out of the house, mainly because it stresses me out so much trying to get everyone out of the door in a relatively decent state. We try to make vague plans to meet people and I recently found out that my friends are telling me to get places earlier now because I am often late (which is NEVER my fault). Anyway, I digress. So, yesterday morning, the heavens opened and we decided that we should get an Uber to take us to the school because we didn’t want Khaya to get his uniform too wet and turn up to school looking dishevelled. We checked the time of the wait for a driver, and booked with enough time to get ready, meet the driver outside and get to the school for 8.50am. The driver cancelled at the very last minute, while he was on his way to us. I guess it was too short a journey. Thanks, buddy. If we left at that time once we knew we would have to now walk to the school, we would just make it at Khaya’s pace. So, we had the genius plan for me to push him in the buggy, which would have shaved off lots of time and we would have managed to keep him dry and looking crisp in his uniform.

I got soaked. Completely through. I had to peel off my clothes when I arrived home, despite having a raincoat on the whole time. I must have looked like a cat who had fallen into a bath. My boots (with whom I have also got a soured relationship) were not very waterproof so I got sopping wet socks from walking through a deep puddle. Then, to add insult to injury, they were a touch too big so I now have two very painful blisters on the back of my heels. Yay.

When I got home and changed, I sat down, switched on my computer and was asked by my partner, ‘Isn’t it time to take Nathi to the hospital for his eye appointment?’. Ugh. I hadn’t eaten or had a cuppa, so I felt like a zombie. We got Nathi up, dressed and out of the door (and even got him to wear his glasses!), and we were off. Everything went well after that, except for mis-predicting how long it would take to get to the school to collect Khaya at 3pm. Nathi and I were out, so we hadn’t done that journey before. Needless to say, my partner had to stop work to go and get him (Sorry, darling). But, we all met up at the school and went to the pub together. We watched the poor unfortunate souls through the window while I sank into my Pinot Noir and nursed my aching heels.

I hope all of you have had more successful school runs. And, if anyone has a car they want to donate, please let me know.

NSG xxx

Photo credit: Pete Nowicki on Unsplash

Who, or What the Heck, is Not So Goldilocks?

Parenting

So, I’m sure you have begun to see me popping up on your social media feeds. I really hope so, as I have been working hard to infiltrate all platforms and not getting paid for it!

But, what am I all about? Who am I? What am I? What exactly can I bring to the world to make it a better place? Well, I don’t quite know about that, but I can answer some simple questions…

What makes you happy?

Strawberry Pop Tarts, when the boys give each other a hug, chocolate, hugs from my fella (Can you see a pattern forming here??), laughing, getting lost in a good book, creating new stories with my sons, making people laugh.

What are your vices?

Erm, Strawberry Pop Tarts… and anything sweet, really. I could eat massive bowls of cereal for each meal every day forever, with not enough room in the bowl for the milk. And then, for snacks, Cadbury’s Fruit and Nut. A whole bar. One of the big ones… or maybe more than one…

Where have you lived?

I am currently living in South West London, which I love, but I have lived in Southampton, Winchester, and have had a year-long home in Lilongwe, the capital city of the beautiful country of Malawi, which my sons and I stayed in on-and-off for a total of 6 months last year. I also call Swaziland and Johannesburg in South Africa my homes. We have family in both countries and it really feels like home when we go to visit them.

When did you start writing?

I have always loved writing and creating stories, and I think I was quite good at it at school. My only issue was self-confidence. When I left secondary school, I wanted to be a journalist and went into sixth-form with this in mind as my career goal. But I didn’t do well in my A-levels, and it knocked my confidence completely out of the park. I put it to the back of my mind. I got into working life and just didn’t have time to write! I did always, and still do, love to communicate via writing rather than verbally in person or on the phone – Thank goodess for the introduction of emails! I have recently decided it’s time to start the writing up again and have come up with a few ideas for novels. For the time being, I will be developing these ideas between work, kids, life, family, chores… and you can watch this space! I will be continuing with the blog, though, as it is really great to have a place to write whenever I feel the inspiration!

Why ‘Not So Goldilocks’?

I came up with the name after I found out that Bear MiniMum had been used already! It really comes from having three bears (my partner and two sons) and not very golden locks!

Anything else?

If you have any other questions for me, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me via email at notsogoldilocksblog@gmail.com.

NSG xxx

Thank You!

Life, Parenting

Happy Hot Day, everyone. I hope you’re all keeping cool somehow. If not, wait until tomorrow when the temp will drop by about 10 degrees!

I had a nice start to the day today – I woke up this morning to notifications from WordPress telling me that my blog had been visited more often than usual for a Tuesday morning. I had loads of views at around 7am. I have spent ALL day trying to work out why – Was it something I tagged in a post that is currently trending? Nope. Did someone famous signppost their Twitter followers to my blog? Nope.

Then I had a brainwave about an hour ago.

I regularly receive the Nappy Valley Net weekly e-newsletter, which is aimed for parents in the SW London area. A couple of weeks ago they posted an article/discussion about something that was written about my grandparents in the press (They live locally, too. Upstairs, in fact). The article said that my grandfather was sad to have to sell their Wandsworth home. This wasn’t true, and the words that were actually spoken were taken way out of context. I’m sure it went along the lines of ‘We probably should downsize, but we can’t bear to leave this house’. The discussion on Nappy Valley Net garnered a lot of lovely comments from local parents who have enjoyed their Great Canal Journeys programme and showed real compassion for their situation. I felt that I had to set the record straight about them – That they are not reluctantly selling their home at all. So, about a week or so ago, I posted a comment on the discussion.

Early this morning I received the new Nappy Valley Net e-newsletter which contained an update on that story mentioning me and my comment! And, because I posted as Not So Goldilocks, I guess some of the other parents who were browsing through the newsletter at the crack of dawn, like myself, wanted to see who I was (now that they knew where I lived!).

And that was it! My ‘Eureka’ moment.

So, thank you so much to Nappy Valley Net and all of its followers – Not only for the welcome traffic, but for the beautiful and supportive messages you have posted about my grandparents. I will pass them all on.

NSG xxx

Not-So-SAHM

Life, Parenting

I am very excited to share some news with you…I have a new job! A proper part-time job with a proper company with proper people and stuff! I am so happy and excited about getting back into the world of work, and I wanted to share this with all the mamas who are probably feeling the same way I did a little while ago – Scared, nervous and worried that, perhaps, there was no hope of me getting out of stay-at-home motherhood without writing a bestselling novel or two (but when would I have the time for that??).

I had been applying for jobs locally that had specified the amount of hours, but not the actual days, that they wanted someone to work. It was really difficult to find roles which were able to work around the boys’ childcare. And a lot of the jobs were asking for someone to work three days per week, when I could only really manage two.

All of the roles I applied for ended in nothing. Not even an invitation for an interview. I had been blacklisted before I even started! I wondered if it was because of the 4-year ‘sabbatical’ on my application forms, or the way I had covered that period of my employment on my CV. I never actually thought to ask any of the companies I applied to. But, I always think that certain things happen for good reasons. Luckily for me, I have now found a job that I know I will enjoy, for a company that I admire, and with people I know I will get on with (in an office only 6 mins’ walk from my partner’s!). So, how did it happen? How did I go from no follow-ups to landing a job after my first interview in seven years?

I’ll tell you. I went through an agency.

I really didn’t know that I was going to go through an agency, but the job I applied for online was advertised by an agency, not the direct employer. I’m not adverse to the idea, but I was dubious about how it would all work. I hadn’t been to a recruitment agency in years! It turns out that it really was the right move for me at this time in my career. And it’s all down to the fact that they chat to you, they see you, they get to know YOU, not just the black and white of a CV or application form. They can see how a candidate might fit into a company or team. That level of personability really made the difference for me. The agent met me on FaceTime and we got on really well. I was honest about what I could offer the company and she was honest about what they wanted from their successful candidate. It was the start of that feeling of ‘Oh wow, this feels really right’.

She called me later on that week to let me know that they wanted to see me for an interview. I spent that next few days telling myself NOT to be nervous (which actually worked) and to just be myself. I think I went in to it thinking ‘que sera sera’ and that it wasn’t a big deal. That helped ease my nerves, and I ended up having a really lovely informal interview with my (now) new colleagues/superiors. I then received a call to say that they’d like to invite me to a second interview to meet the boss (eek), which also went well.

So, then was the excruciating wait to see if I had been chosen. The decision had to be delayed but it was worth the wait. I was so happy. I felt that I was now more than just a mama. I felt that I was capable of being something like the person I used to be before I had the boys. It was a great feeling, and I am sure I am going to continue feeling like that when I start the job. I feel like I will actually have a ‘work-life balance’ at last!

So, if you’re a SAHM and you’re looking for some part-time work, try using an agency to help you. Especially if you can only work odd days or hours – They will hopefully be able to find you something to suit! If you’re in London and want to find out who I used, please send me a message and I’ll be happy to oblige!

Thanks for reading,

NSG xxx

Photo credit: Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

One Of Those Mornings…

Parenting

I know all of you will sympathise. We have just had ‘one of those days’ so far today. Some of you may have seen on my Instastory/FB Story that we had to wait for another bus while already running late as there were already two buggies on the bus we needed to catch. Well, this actually happened to us THREE bloody times today!! So, here is my checklist of things that have added up to a crappy morning…

I am ill – I have the lurgy. The boys both gave it to me (mostly Nathi). I took some day nurse tablets, but they did a very lazy job.
I had a scary dream about a massive, human-eating eagle. See photo for interpretation…
We did really well up until the moment we had to leave which, of course, was the ONLY time Khaya decided he needed to take his Darth Vader costume out with us. And could I find it?! I also had to tell him that we didn’t have time for him to eat a yoghurt because we needed to leave NOW.
We had to wait 9 minutes for a bus because of two other buggies being on the bus we could have caught which would have made us ON TIME for Nathi’s dance class. There is only one bus that can get us there without a mammoth walk at the other end. Joy.
The boys both had tantrums when we arrived at the class. Nathi refused to take off his coat and shoes, and Khaya decided to stay out in the foyer. Here we were at a nice, fun dance class with lovely, well-behaved children, and my two boys are either rolling around screaming and shouting or opening the door and also pressing his face against the glass… #embarrassed
One of my boys accidentally bumped into another child… and didn’t apologise.
Nathi fell over and bumped his chin on the floor. At this point, I wanted to know how to reset either the whole day or all of us, one by one.
We had to wait for the THIRD bus at our stop before we could get on. Bloody buggies everywhere! Even the driver commented on this.
When we arrived at a children’s play cafe, neither of the boys would leave my side to go and play. Just annoying, but I can’t hold this against them. They clearly think I’m the bee’s knees.
I spent £10 on two biscuits. Yep, that’s right. I didn’t even see this until I paid our bill. They were, in their defence, very beautifully decorated, but £5 each?! They’re going to get EATEN!
We just missed another bus on our way home. I really, really wish I had a car sometimes…

So, that was our morning or, as I like to think of it, the universe’s way of telling us we shouldn’t have even attempted to leave the house today.

Please share any of your ‘one of those days’ with me – I’d love to hear about them! I won’t compare, I promise.

Here’s to a great weekend ahead,

NSG xxx

What has NSG been up to this week?

Parenting

Hello followers! How are you all? I hope you’re having a good week, whether it is raining, windy, sunny, or all of the above.

It has been an interesting week in NSG Towers. Khaya turned a magnificent FOUR on Monday, and we took a rather brilliant trip to Hamley’s on Regent Street in order for him to choose his birthday present. We also promised Nathi an ‘unbirthday present’, which is a tradition in my family. Here are some of the highlights:

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We have also been busy seeing family, and making Baba Bear feel comfortable in his London home after being away for over a year.

Mama has been on a bit of a fundraising jolly, having raised over and above my goal for Ovacome through my birthday fundraiser. We now have an active family fundraiser for Comic Relief through JustGiving, which went live this evening. The boys took part in a cake sale at their nursery today, and we will all be tuning in to the Comic Relief live show on BBC1 tomorrow evening.

I was also very moved by the awful Ethiopian Airways plane crash this week. It was, quite frankly, way too close to home. Not only have we used that airline, and possibly that very aircraft, in the past, but my partner told me that he could have been on that flight if he’d decided to stay in Ethiopia a little longer for a work launch. He said that he would have flown any route to get him back to the UK that didn’t cost the earth, which very well may have included flying from Addis Ababa to Nairobi for a connecting flight. I can’t imagine what the families of those poor victims are going through right now. My thoughts are with them.

I have ordered more merchandise for my company, just for me, and have been working on a business plan to find out what I can do next. What kind of journey will this venture take me on? I never saw myself as someone who would need to know anything about business, but perhaps this is what I was meant to do after all.

I am currently halfway through my amazing Start Writing Fiction course, which I signed up for through FutureLearn. It is free, and it is run by the Open University. I am really enjoying it, and am getting lots of interesting and useful guidance for my fiction writing. And, did I mention, IT’S FREE! I urge you to go to their site and see if there is a course for you. I bet there will be. Here you go: https://www.futurelearn.com/.

And now, we are gearing up for our friends at Two Gents’ production of The Importance of Being Earnest at Tara Arts Theatre in Earlsfield, SW18, which closes on Saturday night. If you’re local and fancy a night out, please book your tickets here. It’s a two-hander, both females, and should be a very interesting and entertaining night of theatre!

So, I hope everyone has a great weekend, and please donate anything you can to our Comic Relief fundraiser over on JustGiving. It all goes to the people who need it the most and, as much as I believe that this shouldn’t be how the world is in 2019, every little will help. Thank you, and goodnight.

NSG xxx

PS. I learned a little lesson in reblogging today, and how not to do it. I reposted a lovely post that I had enjoyed by another blogger on WordPress, but hadn’t made it clear enough that it wasn’t my own post… Needless to say, I had a concerned friend contact me by text about it, so immediately took it down again. Huge apologies to the blogger who wrote the original post – I am still learning!

Not So Pancake Day

Parenting

Just to be different/edgy/quirky, Pancake Day in the NSG household will be on Ash Wednesday. Mainly because neither of the boys finished their dinner last night, so I wasn’t going to give in and feed them sugar instead, despite their demands and tantrums! Sometimes it is so hard to mention these things to kids, as it completely affects their ability to do anything in the moment once they know something really exciting will happen soon. And, of course, they’re going to prefer a delicious chocolate-filled pancake rather than the (actually-rather-delicious) pie and mash that I made for their dinner.

I make pancakes quite often, thanks to an amazing recipe that I was given a while ago when cereal or porridge just wasn’t cutting it with my firstborn at breakfast time. Here is a link to the recipe I was given: 2-ingredient banana pancakes. In this recipe, they recommend many different options, and I have played around with different additions for ages. I think I have got it down now, and we love to eat them with plain Greek yoghurt and fresh blueberries or strawberries. Here is what I mix together for the pancake batter:

Bananas – Make sure they’re ripe to overripe.
Eggs (large) – Use one egg for every banana you use
Porridge oats (A sprinkle to thicken the batter a bit)
Milk (To thin it out again!) – You just need a splash or two
Cinnamon (Because everything should have cinnamon in it) – A pinch or two, depending on your taste
Raisins – Enough so that each pancake has about 5 or 6 raisins in it

Use a little butter for frying, and keep them small. I usually do about two or three in the pan at the same time. Serve them with the yoghurt and berries, and enjoy! Perhaps this may help one of you when your child refuses to eat their breakfast. If these don’t work, there is a wonderful website with many ideas for new and exciting meals for kids called My Lovely Little Lunchbox. Take a look for yourself.

Wishing everyone a Happy Ash Wednesday, and good luck if you’re giving something up for Lent this year.

NSG xxx

An Apology

Parenting

So, I have spent the whole morning editing and checking every single one of my fifteen blog posts, completely unaware that each time I updated the changes, I was actually posting the whole thing to each one of my social media sites! So, if you’re now completely sick of seeing my face popping up on your news feed, then this apology is for you.

If it is any consolation, it has been rather enlightening going back over the past two years of my motherhood and realising how far I have come. After many ups and downs, and many trips across the continents, I think things are beginning to settle down for me. I think I am doing a lot better at this parenting game/job/life now.

Thank you for supporting me with my blog, and for hopefully sticking by me after being bombarded with all of my old posts today.

NSG xxx

(Photo credit: Felix Koutchinski from Unsplash.com)