parenthood

I am very excited to share some news with you…I have a new job! A proper part-time job with a proper company with proper people and stuff! I am so happy and excited about getting back into the world of work, and I wanted to share this with all the mamas who are probably feeling the same way I did a little while ago – Scared, nervous and worried that, perhaps, there was no hope of me getting out of stay-at-home motherhood without writing a bestselling novel or two (but when would I have the time for that??).

I had been applying for jobs locally that had specified the amount of hours, but not the actual days, that they wanted someone to work. It was really difficult to find roles which were able to work around the boys’ childcare. And a lot of the jobs were asking for someone to work three days per week, when I could only really manage two.

All of the roles I applied for ended in nothing. Not even an invitation for an interview. I had been blacklisted before I even started! I wondered if it was because of the 4-year ‘sabbatical’ on my application forms, or the way I had covered that period of my employment on my CV. I never actually thought to ask any of the companies I applied to. But, I always think that certain things happen for good reasons. Luckily for me, I have now found a job that I know I will enjoy, for a company that I admire, and with people I know I will get on with (in an office only 6 mins’ walk from my partner’s!). So, how did it happen? How did I go from no follow-ups to landing a job after my first interview in seven years?

I’ll tell you. I went through an agency.

I really didn’t know that I was going to go through an agency, but the job I applied for online was advertised by an agency, not the direct employer. I’m not adverse to the idea, but I was dubious about how it would all work. I hadn’t been to a recruitment agency in years! It turns out that it really was the right move for me at this time in my career. And it’s all down to the fact that they chat to you, they see you, they get to know YOU, not just the black and white of a CV or application form. They can see how a candidate might fit into a company or team. That level of personability really made the difference for me. The agent met me on FaceTime and we got on really well. I was honest about what I could offer the company and she was honest about what they wanted from their successful candidate. It was the start of that feeling of ‘Oh wow, this feels really right’.

She called me later on that week to let me know that they wanted to see me for an interview. I spent that next few days telling myself NOT to be nervous (which actually worked) and to just be myself. I think I went in to it thinking ‘que sera sera’ and that it wasn’t a big deal. That helped ease my nerves, and I ended up having a really lovely informal interview with my (now) new colleagues/superiors. I then received a call to say that they’d like to invite me to a second interview to meet the boss (eek), which also went well.

So, then was the excruciating wait to see if I had been chosen. The decision had to be delayed but it was worth the wait. I was so happy. I felt that I was now more than just a mama. I felt that I was capable of being something like the person I used to be before I had the boys. It was a great feeling, and I am sure I am going to continue feeling like that when I start the job. I feel like I will actually have a ‘work-life balance’ at last!

So, if you’re a SAHM and you’re looking for some part-time work, try using an agency to help you. Especially if you can only work odd days or hours – They will hopefully be able to find you something to suit! If you’re in London and want to find out who I used, please send me a message and I’ll be happy to oblige!

Thanks for reading,

NSG xxx

Photo credit: Photo by Tyler Nix on Unsplash

I have just read an article which I’ve had saved on my Facebook account for about a week (We all know how difficult it is to get around to these things!) – An interview with the psychotherapist Philippa Perry (who is also married to the rather brilliant artist, Grayson Perry) about her new book, The Book You Wish Your Parents Had Read (and Your Children Will Be Glad That You Did). I felt compelled to share it with you all (just click on the book title to be taken magically to the article), as it really resonated with me. I am sure some of you other parents will also feel the same way when you read the interview. In fact, the interviewer herself, Robyn Wilder, draws upon her own very personal experiences as a child and a mother.

As a mother who is sometimes, or often if I’m being really honest, lacking in enthusiasm to engage with my children, this article really struck a chord. She is completely right, of course, and I know that I have some work to do to make sure that my boys don’t grow up to be depressed, anxious and, well, like me. Although, saying that, I read the article aloud to my mother, and she only commented on the fact that she never drank coffee (See the article for context)! The truth is that my mum gave her all to us when we were growing up, and put us before everything else, yet I still came into adulthood having bouts of depression and anxiety.

During the parenting journey, we probably don’t realise that the things we do and say can have such an incredible impact on our children. Perhaps we don’t realise until it’s too late. But, what Philippa Perry says is not to fret. We all make mistakes, we are all ‘bad parents’. Even the parents we think have it all sussed out have failed now and then. Sometimes, even on our really off days, we can still succeed. In this day and age of alternative parenting techniques, often written by people who don’t have children, this is a refreshing and rather logical book of ‘advice’ coming from a psychotherapist who has been working with people with depression, anxiety and other mental health issues, as well as being a mother herself. Needless to say, I immediately followed the link to buy the book only to find out that it is currently not available. I hope that means that Philippa Perry has completely sold out and is now waiting for more books to be printed!

If you can, grab yourself a copy. I think it will be an interesting read for any parent and very different from the usual parenting advice books. If any of you have any other recommendations like this book, do let me know in the comments section of this post. I’d love to hear from you. Thanks!

Have a good week, followers and chums,

Not So Goldilocks xxx